parents

I have been a horrible blogger because I have no answered the most common question of them all: how did my parents take it? Mainly because I’ve been so overwhelmed with everything else that I haven’t had time to type it all out. But also because I don’t really know how to explain or put it into words.

The story:

I had a sudden urge the night before the consultation to tell my parents. My mom is a nurse and I knew she would want information from the surgeon and I didn’t want to leave out any questions that she might have for him. I also didn’t want to do it alone. Of course, I had my other supports, but I still felt alone without my parents. Especially going to such a serious doctors appointment.

I asked them if I could come over after work, but they said that would be too late. So I sent them my blog to read and told them to read it when they had a chance and then I would come over to talk in person. My mom didn’t want to read it until I could come over after so she said she was going to wait until Friday night. Of course, I got a call later that night because she couldn’t hold herself back.

I was upset when she called and answered a bit *grumpily* saying “I’m going to bed can we talk tomorrow.” I didn’t know she had read it. The voice on the other side was warm, sad, and loving at the same time. “I read your blog and dad is reading it now.”

I stopped. I didn’t know what to say. I let out a laugh because I didn’t know what else to do. “So…what do you think?”

“Well, it’s not a big surprise, and you know we love you so much.”

And the rest is history. They were so extremely wonderful I cannot explain the calmness and acceptance and love I heard over the phone.

We spoke shortly and I made sure that her nerves were as calmed as possible…my mother doesn’t sleep well when her mind is running and I didn’t want her to be up all night worrying. We planned for me to come over a couple days after (that Friday) to talk in person. And since then, it’s been a process but a calm, loving one. Nothing feels hassled or rushed, and no one is doubting my decision. Of course they are concerned that I will regret it, but I think they need that reassurance more than I do.

I wish every trans* individual could have this experience, but I know that is not the case. I keep them all in my heart and am here for anyone that wants to talk.